The Why…

16 Jul

Failed.

That is how my latest interaction with a human of the male persuasion ended.  He wasn’t the One.  I knew it even before he told me that he preferred to see the Spiderman movie instead of Ted.  I also knew it because he smokes, but I had decided to be more lenient with my dealbreakers in order to up my dating odds.  I knew it when, after our last encounter, I didn’t feel… inspired enough to sext him.

Still, I pursued him.  I did it out of boredom with my otherwise not engaged dating life.  I did it because it felt good to have someone slightly interested in me.  Someone who classified me as hot, sexy, and fun.  The problem is:  it did not last.

It did not last, I’m sure, because I  do  not  know  how  to  date.

To understand this you would have to know that I never went through the experience of dating different people when I was younger.  I got married at 23 to my second boyfriend.  The marriage lasted 10 years, and the divorce left me with a shaky sense of uncertainty in everything that I held as the truth before.

As of now, I have no valid working theories from which to pull in my new quest for love.  Whatever I believed in before about love and relationships is not true anymore.  So, I thought I would do as lots of great minds have done before me.  I will turn to the infinite wisdom that resides in the internet for answers and advice.

My purpose for this blog is to document my quest for love and a relationship.  I will accept well intended advice, and sometimes I will even follow it.  I will also accept date suggestions, so If you’re into matchmaking, I say:  try me out!

All throughout I will try to keep my sense of humor about it all, even though right now the sting of rejection hurts just a little.

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